When we spoke about the epiphany and the negative together i thought to myself, there is no way that an epiphany could be negative. mainly because i was thinking stricktly about feeling rather than knowledge that one gets while having an epiphany. then i started to think, of course epiphanies can be negative.... and for me i think that main reason they can be, is because sometimes those eurphoric moments also bring harsh realities. overall one of the hardest things to deal with in life are things that you dont want to admit to yourself. and when it comes time to admit these things (and there always comes a time) that moment of realization not only hurts horribly, but its as if that something has just lifted and you can breathe just a little bit better than before.
the most recent 'oooh' moment i had was durring christmas break. family was all around for my great aunts birthday and it was a very important time for all of us. just a few months ago my great grandfather died, and my great grandmother is still kickin' it, but this time has been very hard for her because its the first time in over 80 years since she has been without Papa Tony. and i have noticed that since his death she has been much more understanding, much more loving, and far more humble before... i guess it has taken his death to make her realize she doesnt want to miss out on anything else while she is still with her family. while we were all sitting around towards the end of the night, grandma looked at all the grand daughters that were there and said , ' Dont sit and just dream, Just LIVE'. at that moment i realized that so much of peoples time is spent THINKING about what they want to do and not actually doing it, because it SCARES people to really get out there and admit they want to try something new, move somehwere new, get out of their comfort zones.
i guess i tied this moment to the negative epiphanies because when there is a negative reasoning for an epiphany there is still wonder that can come from it. because if what my grandma said, i know that i wont spend the years of my life thinking about what i would like to do, or dream to do...... i just have to go out there and make those dreams happen, and if they dont happen , at least now that i tried for it.
